Someone chasing, I cannot move, standing rigid, nightmare's statue
What a dream, when will it end, and will I transcend?
Restless sleep, the minds in turmoil, one nightmare ends, another fertile
Getting to me, so scared to sleep, but scared to wake now, in too deep
Even though its reached new heights, I rather like the restless nights
It makes me wonder, it makes me think there's more to this, I'm on the brink
It's not the fear of what's beyond, It's just that I might not respond
I have an interest almost craving, but would I like to get too far in?
It can't all be coincidence, too many things are evident
You tell me you're an unbeliever, spiritualist? Well me I'm neither
But wouldn't you like to know the truth of what's out thereto have the proof
And find out just which side you're on
Where would you end in heaven or in hell?
Help me, help me to find my true self without seeing the future
Save me, save me from torturing myself, even within my dreams
There's got to be just more to it than this, or tell me why do we exist?
I'd like to think that when I die, I'd get a chance another time
And to return and live again, reincarnate, play the game
Again and again and again and again"
- Infinite Dreams by Iron Maiden
See what happened was that I was listening to some classic Maiden in my car, and Infinite Dreams starts, and the words are cool, so I listen for a snipet to post on my site as the intro to my pathetic journal entry.
I had nothing planned yet as to what I would talk about, especially since I didn't wanna whine about how I have to work tomorrow , since I already whined about that, or how I hate my life, because Fucking A, even I get tired of hearing that, and it's my life.
There's also that paragraph I said I wanted to quote from the book I'm not yet quite finished reading.
But that can wait…
So anyway, I'm listening to the song, and every line is almost good enough in and of itself. And I start thinking, Fucking A, just post the whole thing.
But then it hits me, not only do I post the whole song, but I also talk about the subject itself. It's something that fascinates me, but something I know nothing about.
So here's the thing…within my very small circle of friends, a few of them seem to, I dunno, "know" things. "Feel" things. "See" things.
I jokingly refer to it as "seeing dead people", in a whispered voice, a la Sixth Sense…and it does often seem like I make light of the things they tell me, but trust me, they are very serious when they tell me.
The stories run the gamut from all out ghost stories, to much more subtle, metaphysical things. It's all pretty amazing, and much of it is pretty disturbing. Well, to me anyway, but we all know I'm the world's biggest wimp.
Me? I dunno, but I've never knowingly experienced anything that can be labeled supernatural. Weird too, because I kinda surround myself with darkness and weird shit, but nothing. Yet these other people, pretty chipper, happy people for the most part, they seem to have a lot to deal with.
Maybe I don't experience this stuff because somehow, someone (something) out there some where knows I prolly couldn't handle it. I mean I still occasionally think about one story I've heard…but to be honest, this one didn't come from any of the people I referred to before.
No, this one came from a very religious person, so the possibility exists that this story has been given a pro-God slant.
Anyway, the story goes that this lady was very unhappy with her daughter's current choice for a boyfriend, and that she didn't trust him, etc.
Anyway, one night when she was trying to sleep, she glances over in her darkened bedroom to see this weird Demon-thing crouching in the corner, smiling a hideous demonic smile and laughing a malicious demonic laugh. Thing is, his face was basically the boyfriend's face.
I know, that's either Hollywood style bullshit, or just a religious fanatic's attempt to dissuade her daughter from making a bad move. But still, every now and then I think of that story, and I can picture in my mind that Demon-thing, rubbing his hands together greedily, with an evil sense of self-satisfaction.
It just kinda freaks me out.
So yeah, the stories I hear from these other people are much more subtle than that, but when it comes down to it, are just as fascinating and disturbing.
Ironically, I had planned this discussion yesterday, but today I got yet another story from a friend. Weird, huh?
I mean, what she said is her business, but the fact that she had yet another experience kinda blows me away. Especially since I knew I'd be talking about this, and she didn't…
So yeah, the afterlife, psychic abilities, ghosts, reincarnation, witchcraft, and yeah, even good old religion are all subjects that always kindle my interest, even though I have no idea what to make of them.