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I JUST GOTTA VENT
APRIL 2001

Sunday 4/29/01
"It's been a while, since I said I'm sorry..." - Staind

So like, Staind are the new kings of angst.
They're nifty.

I posted a new review in the movie section.

I'm a little worried about some of my friends...
OK, actually, of my small circle of close friends, I'm basically worried about all of them, but right now, one is a stand out, and I am really worried.
Today I actually had to bitch at him and I literally told him to get help.
Me, telling some one to get help.
Unfuckingbelievable.
I hope he can work through his issues.
They run deep, and it will definitely not be a walk in the park for him anytime soon...

And as usual, I worry for myself.
But that just goes with the territory...

So I was scarfing down a healthy BK lunch when an old married couple sat down near me, and held hands and said grace before starting their processed food stuffs.
I dunno why, but I found that sweet.
Why is it that I have this twisted love / hate relationship with all things religious?

Sunday 4/22/01
"Nobody will ever let you know
When you ask the reasons why
They'll just tell you that you're on your own
Fill your head all full of lies" - Black Sabbath

I don't really feel like writing anything. I mean, I kinda wanted to bitch about all the money I had to spend for 4 new tires, and balancing, and alignment...but why bother?
I had to do it, and I did.

I was gonna talk more about my job, and how people keep getting fired, especially the nice people, and how I'm really hating it, and how I really do wanna better myself, and that I do hate the way my life is going, despite appearances to the contrary.

And I was gonna mention that I saw a really great movie, and that I posted a review in the Movie Section.

And I was even considering mentioning that I think I may have actually "met" someone...
But upon further review, let me not get into that for now...

Monday 4/16/01
"Poets and Madmen
All defy reason..." - Savatage

Ooops, yesterday I forgot to mention that I had seen a new movie and posted a review for it in the Movie Section.
But it wasn't a great movie, and it's hardly a great review, so that's all good...

Tomorrow is the release date for the new Savatage CD, Poets and Madmen!
And then exactly one month from tomorrow, I'll be seeing them live at the House of Blues in Orlando! Day after that, we might be hitting one of the parks too!
Can I get an Amen?!?

Sunday 4/15/01
"Daylight dreamers awaken on
Deserts of desperation
Lonely lives learn to live on
Islands of isolation" - Fates Warning

Damn, I'm sore as hell.
My arms hurt, my legs hurt…even my midsection hurts a bit.
I only lost three 21 point games of racquetball yesterday, by an average score of about 20 points per game.
I suck at racquetball, and anything else that can in anyway be considered an athletic endevour…

So I finally finished reading The Exorcist.
Fucking A, what a disturbing little novel. I've always heard that it was based on a true story.
Joy.
I think what I'm gonna do now, is buy the DVD of "the Version You've Never Seen Before", but watch by chapters. Get some of the ugly stuff outta the way, and then watch it in it's entirety.
Damn, I can just imagine a month's worth of sleepless nights ahead…

Next up in my ever present library is a vampire novel called Sisters of the Night: The Angry Angel. Hope it's good.

So yeah, Happy Easter.
Very confusing holiday.
Is it religious, or is it just cavity producing?
You be the judge.

Back to work tomorrow.
Ugh.
It's not too pleasant around there lately, what with sales being kinda slow, and money being kinda tight, and the fucking A/C only working at random intervals.
To top it off, the Boss will be back after a week plus off for vacation.
I think we all kinda slacked in his absence, and something tells me he's gonna be cracking whips left and right.
Joy.

Friday 4/13/01
"You crucified me but I'm back in your bed
Like Jesus Christ coming back from the dead...
...I came around to tear your little world apart
And break your soul apart" - Garbage

It's Friday the 13th. Oooh...

Today is also Good Friday, and I ended up at BK for lunch.
So for whatever reason, I decided to get a Big Fish sandwich.
No, that's the thing...It wasn't for “whatever” reason...
I kinda did it because it's Good Friday...and the good Christian boys and girls aren't supposed to eat meat.

Can somebody please explain this to me?
I constantly wax emphatic on how I don't believe because I can't believe and I need proof in order to believe, yet here I am ordering a fish sandwich.
What the hell is wrong with this picture?
I dunno.

So that's it.
I swallowed my BK Good Friday special, and I hightailed it back to the office lobby, so I could continue reading The Exorcist.
Go figure...

Damn, I need help.

Now, to top things off, I had a nice night out with some family and friends and I decided to pass by the mall and see if I could find The Chuban, who's been MIA for a while.
I'm walking towards the main door at the same time as a young twenty-somthing girlie, so I hold the door open for her...
"Thanks sir", she says as she walks in.
SIR?!?
When the hell did I become a sir?
Fucking A, this is all too much to take...

Thursday 4/12/01
"Peace sells, but who's buying?" - Megadeth

So I went ahead and registered for another class at school.
I don't want to take it, but I really am trying to at least grow up a little...
I'm taking a business class. Fucking A to hell, I fucking hate business.
I hate the mentality. I hate the greed. I hate the way that the best business men are really just really good liars that put the bottom, line, the almighty dollar, before every fucking thing.
But the stupid accounting class that I didn't wanna take anyway wasn't available again, so there you go.

In other news, holy fucking shit, the book I'm reading, The Exorcist, is creeping me out to the Nth degree.
I still can't see myself seeing that movie.
Damn, I'm such a fucking wimp...

Tuesday 4/10/01
It's not so much that I hate being a Hopeless Romantic
It's just that I wish there wasn't such an emphasis on the Hopeless part...

Sunday 4/8/01
"I've been looking for a savior in these dirty streets
Looking for a savior beneath these dirty sheets
I've been raising up my hands
Drive another nail in
Just what God needs
One more victim" - Tori Amos

Wow, it's been a week.
BUT I don't have anything new or exciting to write about.
I guess I can mention that I'm sunburned again, and that I really have to learn how to properly apply lotion, but that would be kinda boring.
Or I can mention that my dog smells like Hell, and I really need to wash him, but again, boring.
I can also say that there's really nothing new at the movies for me, but I did see a free advance screening the other day, and I posted a review about it in the movie section.
Again, boring.
Fucking A, Sundays are depressing...

Sunday 4/1/01
"Come my lady
Come, come my lady
You're my butterfly
Sugar
Baby" - Crazy Town

Crazy Town is all about deep, heartfelt lyrics.

So another one bites the dust.
I swear, if I get in anyway attached to somebody at work, they're history.
To protect the innocent, we'll call this one Xena.

Xena is a bit of an enigma to me.
I mean, she's told me quite a bit about herself, and it felt good knowing I was one of the few people she trusted in the office, but how her mind worked will always be a mystery.
She's the coolest person I've ever been friends with, to the point where I found it kinda surprising that she would even give me the time of day.
She's that cool.
But somehow, she remains extremely down to earth.
This past week was a big one for her… Wednesday morning she came up to me with a coy grin on her face, and told me she had something to tell me, "I'm getting married."
Then with a glassy eyed expression, she raised her hand to show me the beautiful ring she had been given. I was so happy for her, and she was so happy…she was radiant.

Cut to Friday afternoon, and she emerges from behind the closed door of the boss' office after about a half hour…sure enough, she was let go.

I know the business world is the business world, and certain things happen, but that doesn't make it any less difficult. I know she's gonna be just fine, but I'll definitely miss our lunches, and her wit and her smile.

And just for the record, I never really called her Xena, but not long ago I poked at her belly and discovered that it was rock hard. I was both very impressed, and quite intimidated actually. I told her I would have to refer to her with something deserving of such a specimen. So I mentioned some "super" women, and she preferred Xena.
And so it goes…

Well, back to the grind…
I may have more to talk about tomorrow…

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