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OH WOE IS ME...
JUNE 2003

Sunday, June 29, 2003

A good friend of mine recently had what could only be described as a "freak accident", and I just want to wish him well.
It's kinda crazy, and he's gonna be fine, but I feel for the guy...

Thursday, June 26, 2003

I relate this story only because I find it kind of funny...
So I went to lunch with a co-worker. We chose a relatively cheap place because we're both broke. It was a sit down restaurant, and the plan was for that person to pay on the debit card, while I gave cash to cover my portion...
We enjoy the meal and the bill comes and my co-worker checks, and realizes the debit card is not there. So I grab the bill, and it's $13.05.
I open my wallet..exactly $13 in there.
Being oppresively anal, I always have change on me, so I dig out a nickel, and call the server over and with my tail between my legs explain that I will have to walk over to the ATM and get some more money and that I'll come back to tip her.
I'm sure she thought I wouldn't, but I did just that.
Rereading what I wrote, I guess the story isn't that funny, but I just thought it was weird that I had just the right amount to cover.
Sheesh, I need a life.

But then, in a non-related bit...

So I'm at school, and I know we're not supposed to have food or drinks in the classroom, but I got there early, and I bought a Sunkist (I figure that's not REALLY a soda...right?) and I go upstairs and sit in class and hand write a letter that will never be delivered (besides I wrote it in cursive, which with my chicken scratch is literally undecipherable)...
By the time class starts I'm basically done with the soda, but I leave the can on my desk as to not get up while the teacher is talking, etc.
About halfway through the class, the man that is akin to the principal of this night school thing happens to walk by the classroom (there are some windows near the doors, and I sit by one)...
This guy literally opens the door, and interupts the class just to demand my can of soda.
I couldn't believe it.
I had to stand up in front of the class (OK, it's only ten people, including one that works at our biggest client...small world, but still, I like to be invisible, and this schmuck made me get up in front of the class), and hand him the can.
I told him something along the lines of, "I feel like I'm in fifth grade", jammed the empty can in his hand and walked back to my seat.
He left, and I couldn't help but think the man was basically just my servant since it was an empty can and he was gonna throw it away for me.
When the teacher let us take a break, I went up to her and apologized for the disruption, and she was all like "don't worry, that was ridiculous of him to do that".
That made me feel better. That guy's an idiot. The average age in my classroom (of ten people!) is prolly 32. We don't need to have stuff confiscated.
Pathetic.

Sunday, June 22, 2003

So itís been all about anger lately.
I mean, first, I totally submerge myself in the new Metallica CD, ST ANGER, which Iíve sort of force fed myself for fear of not liking it. At this point I love it, but my point is that the lyrics really hit close to home and Iím really feeling it.
Then thereís HULK which Iíve already seen twice, and am really feeling too. Thereís a lot for me to identify with in that movie too, and itís not just bad skin.
All that anger. All that emotion. And the way that, at least as I see it, when he unleashes his anger, that beast, heís also, sorta unleashing his inner-child. A really big, bad, inner-child. Iím not Freud, and I donít particularly like ďpsycho-babbleĒ, but some things are way obvious, and thatís how I feel.

Friday, June 13, 2003

OK, so last night hurt a little.
I mean it was nice...
Bittersweet really, I guess.
But there was definitely a symbolic closing of the door in my face...

That, combined with a heavy dinner, but mostly the above, had me wake up at 2:30.
Fun.
When I wake up in the middle of the night like that, my mind goes into overtime and I obsess and dwell, and over-analyze everything that was said and done.
It's a Hell of a way to surely drive myself completely insane...
...a short trip, I assure you.

At around 3:30, I had to get up to visit the little boy's room.
See, the dinner did have something to do with my being awake.
But then I went back to bed, wide awake, even flipped through the channels, then just lay in the dark as my evil fucking mind abused me some more.

Finally I slept, and damn.
Look, this isn't supposed to be a "dream journal", but this time I dreamt that I had sex with Alyssa Milano.
I got news for you. That's NOT a bad thing!
I rarely have sex dreams, so why I had one involving Ms. Milano, who would surely be flattered beyond her wildest dreams at my nocturnal fancies, is beyond me.
She's not even some body I think about often, or list in my little demented lists of "Hottest Celebrities".
Christina Aguilera sits a top that list, cause when you're a skank you're a skank all the way, but DAMN, she is hot!
Anyway, the weird thing is that in the dream, a couple of people saw us, and were really insulted. And one of those people works with me...
So maybe it was all really about my low approval rating among my coworkers?
Who the Hell knows!
But damn it, in my dream I had Ms Milano, and she had me.
AND, she seemed to like it...

Thursday, June 12, 2003

OK, so "Bookkeeping I" is done. "Bookkeeping II", which literally picks up where Class I left off, begins in a couple of weeks.
After all the anxiety, it turned out to be pretty easy going. I think I have a decent understanding of the subject, and it ties in nicely to all the work I do here in the office.

Speaking of which, the office.
Oy vey.
Hypocrisy runs rampant in this place.
I would almost swear I'm the only person here that isn't a devious heathen.
OK, no, there are SOME good people here...
But still, I'm no angel, so that speaks volumes...
But you know what they say about money being the root of all evil, etc...

Wednesday, June 4, 2003

Another dream story...
But not a leopard in sight.
No, I'm just troubled by a dream I had last night in which I was having a job interview at a music store. I guess it was a CD store. I think. All I know is that it killed me to think I had to go back to retail, and worse still, back to a mall setting.
I wonder if that was based on the fact I have been hating work lately?
Well, I always kinda hate work, but it's mostly some of the people I work with, not the job itself.
I dunno.
All I know is I hope I'm done with the retail world...

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