Saturday 9/30/00

Stop me if you've heard this before:
I am the biggest fucking idiot on this or any other fucking planet.

I don't feel like writing.
But tomorrow's another day.

Wednesday 9/27/00

"Which one of these words
Don't you understand/
Talking to you
Is like clapping with one hand" - Anthrax

I have nothing of any importance to say.

I took a co-worker to lunch today because it was her birthday yesterday. It was kind of interesting hearing some of her views about the office and it's inhabitants...

Last week I bitched about how ugly my Creative Writing class had gone that day (last Wednesday) and how I was not liking it, etc. Well, today by the start of class, it was still about half empty...with only two or three more students showing up by the end.
Coincidence? I think not...

I'm listening to Iron Maiden's Piece of Mind CD, which of course is from '83, and was originally only available as an LP and cassette. Duh.
Iron Maiden is a nice thing.
Well, maybe not for Ichabod Crane's mum.

Monday 9/25/00

"You're getting closer
To pushing me off of life's little edge
'Cause I'm a loser
Sooner or later you know I'll be dead" - 3 Doors Down

Just another song for my repertoire of Theme Songs!
Anyway, so I get to school on time, as usual, because I'm rarely, if ever late anywhere! So there. Anyway, the fucking class was cancelled. Actually we waited around for 20 minutes after class should have started just in case. It was kinda fun actually, because we talked a lot.
Me talking to "strangers". Shocking, isn't it.
So I took advantage of the extra time...no, not to go to the writing lab, and do some work on my faulty skills or to read ahead and stay on top.
No, I went straight home. But I did go for a walk, which I don't do as much as I should anymore. So there.
Today's one of me cousin's B-Day.
Oh, have I mentioned that I miss sex?
Well, it's true. It's true.
OK, so I have nothing else to say, I guess...so bye.

Sunday 9/24/00

"…And I
I'm darkness
I'm anger
I'm pain
And I'm
The Evil song you sing inside your brain
Drive you Insane" - Ronnie James Dio

I am always so fucking depressed on Sundays. Sheesh.

Anyway, Friday night I had a good old time. I went to a Comedy club with some friends and family. I had never been to one before. It was very cool. There were three comedians, but the stand out was this FREAK named Greg Hahn, who I used to see sometimes on Comedy Central on cable. He's fucking hilarious. I couldn't stop laughing and my eyes wouldn't stop tearing up! What a blast!

Then Saturday I hung out with Pal Joey and we saw Almost Famous, my review of which is now posted in the Movie Section. Then we farted around like usual and ate at Applebee's , where our lovely server entertained us with her adorably Cracker face! She was a cutie! After some more farting around, we saw Magnolia on DVD. I regret not having seen that in the theaters. It's an amazing, complex, multi-plot lined movie, and despite some "weirdness", it was very deserving of the critical praise it received.
I must add, Tom Cruise was robbed of his Oscar for that performance. Actually, the entire cast was awesome.

The weekend's not really over, but let's face it, for a loser like me, it is. So I guess today's "highlight" if you will, was seeing Woman On Top, starring the ultra-sexy Penelope Cruz. Gee, I really love that name, Penelope. She's soooo hot, but she's never naked.

I actually have a lot of homework…and I don't feel like doing shit!
But I guess I better…

Wednesday 9/20/00

I am in a miserable fucking mood. School is starting to annoy me. It isn't fun, and it is challenging, but not in a "good way"; It's work, and I don't want that! I mean, I'm stuck, because I aint dropping a damn thing, but it just annoys me.
I took two classes, History of Film, and Creative Writing.
History of Film is more fun, but it is very much just a class, with a book, a lot of reading, and what's this, tests?!? FUCK.
Creative Writing, so far anyway, is a fucking English class. Look, I just wanna write shit. Even if it sucks, just let me write what I wanna write, and leave me alone. Fuck, Fuck, FUCK!

Um, I guess I'm hungry too.

Look, I know it's never easy, and it's not supposed to be, but every now and then...once in a fucking blue moon, couldn't I just catch a fucking break?

Tuesday 9/19/00

"With swift desperate hunger, I took her, she standing pressed against the warm stone hearth. Or was it she who took me? She was a lioness, a goddess, full of fire and brazen need, reaching for me unashamed, sinking nails and teeth into my shoulder and gripping me with a fierceness that belied her frail body. Never was my spirit more exalted; Never in a church, a chapel have I come closer to the numinous. The divine. It is the world that is mad, not I, to deem such ecstasy sin."
- From Children Of The Vampire by Jeanne Kalogridis

I'm still reading the book that passage comes from, but when I came across that particular paragraph, I read it and re-read it over and over.
It almost seems auto-biographical…Sigh

Anyway, so we had this really cute new girl start at work on Monday.
I was really looking forward to trying to get to know her.
Funny thing happened on Tuesday though…she didn't show.
She didn't call, and she didn't show.
One whole day there, and already she knew it wasn't for her.


Sunday 9/17/00

"I bring you flowers
I dress in black
But I know this will not bring you back" - CandleMass

So yesterday was kinda weird.

I went to this really bad Sci Fi convention in Fort Lauderdale. After much rigamarole I ended up going with Jedi. He was away for a while, and since his return we've hung together a lot…and it's starting to show. We're getting on each other's nerves, and generally acting like an old married couple. An almost hour long drive together yesterday did not help matters. I think we'll have to stop hanging for a while…even if it means staying home (for the most part) on the weekends.

The convention itself sucked. It was the most expensive entrance fee I've ever paid for a show, $20, reduced from $25 because of many no shows among the scheduled guests.
To be honest, the "guests" are no big deal…you might even wanna call them "has beens" and "never really weres". Of course with his way with words, Jedi managed to offend one of them, Chase Masterson, a kinda bimbo-esque former Star Trekker. UGH.

Well, enough about that. Last night was much more enjoyable.
I went and saw that band again, Cry Wolf, which consists of friends of some of my co-workers. Those co-workers were there again, as well as another one, which I really get along well with, plus I had mentioned it to The Chuban and his girlfriend, and they actually showed up too. That was very nice of them, because they didn't know any body but me.
Very cool.
We had this outrageous waitress whom all my cohorts made fun of because they thought she showed a little too much skin despite having too much skin to show. I thought she was awesome. Yeah she was a little thick, but she was thick in all the right places. She played with me a little bit more than I am used to, at least from "strangers", and it was all I could do to not end up making a fool of myself by pathetically trying to "pick her up".
I came awfully close to trying…believe me.

So bottom line is, nope, I didn't get any…
Hmmm, guess it wasn't really that great of a night after all.

Tuesday 9/12/00

"What are words for
When no one listens any more" - Missing Persons

Sheesh, welcome to AJ's Oldies but Goodies! Missing Persons. Wow.
So I'm in my usual glum, blechy mood. It's so very cliche, but I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired.

I'm listening to Jag Panzer's "Thane To The Throne" CD. It's a Power Metal concept album based on Shakespeare's Macbeth.
Good shit man.

Fuck it. I really don't feel like writing right now.
Or breathing for that matter...

Sunday 9/10/00

"You attract pain" - a friend trying to get me to change my life

Hmmm, not much to tell...
Pretty boring weekend over all...no big surprise there. I mean there has been some fun, and hanging with a friend and his brother at Outback Staeakhouse provided most of it. Some of the servers and hostesses there were fucking amazing...even if all of them made me feel so old.
Just like at school...some of these girls are almost half my age. UGH!
School's going OK. It not very realistic of me, but I was hoping it would be this life changing thing for me to go back to school. Obviously so far nothing's really changed.
Who knows? Maybe with time...
Work? Same old, same old. Still hate it, but still too fucking lazy and scared to really do anything about it.
Actually, there's a possibility of some changes coming at work that may prove to be interesting. Details forthcoming if they turn out to be actually happening.
Well that's about it for now. Saw another movie, Nurse Betty. "Review" in the movie section.

Did I mention I REALLY miss...SEX?!?

Monday 9/4/00

"So you tell me to trust you
I can trust you
As far as I could throw you
But I gotta work it out
In a shadow of a doubt
Cause I don't know if I know you" - Dream Theater
Been doing this a year now.
Fucking sad, huh?
Long weekend.
Some weird shit going on.
Just don't feel like writing right now.
Did update the movie section though.
More later.