Sunday 10/27/2002

Did you set your clocks back?
I'm anal, so the whole place was done the night before...

Fuck, I think I gave myself a papercut on my tongue!

I saw a fucked up movie on tape, Vulgar. Ugly stuff.

I saw Sci-Fi's SAINT SINNER because I have no life and am often home Saturday nights.

And in case you didn't know, I posted my review to PUNCH-DRUNK LOVE yesterday. Shit, you can't comare the two movies, obviously, but next toVulgar, P-DL is the feel good movie of the year...

Friday 10/25/2002

Disturbed and Korn are playing in Miami tonight, but I'm not going.
Fuck, Disturbed's becoming one of my favorites, but I hate those long shows with multiple bands, and I hate downtown Miami.

So yeah, I guess they got the sniper?
Weird. Scary. Sad. Relief...

So work is all fucked up.
You can cut the tension with a knife...a stupid expression, but very fitting.
Lot of weird shit going on...terminations, resignations...
...and of course more office poilticking and back stabbing than can possibly be healthy.

Thursday 10/17/2002

I got to go to a free advance screening last night. The theater is one I don't really ever need to go to again, and the crowd was too rowdy, and I don't like the area, but Fucking A, THE MOVIE was great.

Thursday 10/10/2002


Thursday 10/3/2002

I’m an asshole.
We all know this…no surprise there.

I’m an idiot…
Another no brainer.

I’m having lunch in a fast food establishment that exploits Mexican heritage and I sit near a woman who’s casually eating and reading a book. I sat in a way where I was facing her profile. As I bit into my very messy food stuff consisting of artificial meat, cheese, lettuce, tomato & sour cream wrapped in a fried corn tortilla shell (which cracked open immediately…UGH) I took a look at the woman and realized who she was.
Once upon a time, I was madly in love with her…

Now, coming from me, that could mean almost anybody, I know.
But about 11 years ago, she was one of my bosses in one of my retail hell jobs…
I couldn’t believe it was her.
A woman I confessed my feelings too.
A woman I gave a home made heavy metal/hard rock compilation tape on which I dedicated Judas Priest’s “Touch of Evil” to her on the handwritten cover I made up.
A woman who once threw me into meltdown by asking me if she sounded evil…

That woman, sitting that so close to me, after all these years.

And when she got up and looked in my direction, I basically buried my face in my sloppy, messy, rather untasty food and then looked in the other direction.

What the fuck?
Why am I the world’s least socially competent man?

I’ll never understand.

Maybe it was because she looked way different than I remembered.
She was totally a suburban mom in her early forties now, with a short hair style that looked nothing like her much longer full head of hair that I fondly remember.

But still, I should have said something.

I’m an idiot.

I’m an asshole…

Tuesday 10/1/2002

Well, it's October already.
I just finished reading The Bell Jar. It was well written, and Sylvia Plath sure had a way with words...there's some great passages in there, but I think overall, I was disappointed. I always thought that book was the be all and end all of "my peope", the mentally unstable. And yeah, it definitely hit hard at times, but in general, it was much more upbeat than I expected. But like I said, she knew how to write, and it's sad that she died so young.

Had a weird dream (well, duh, they all are) where I had to get on stage and do stand up comedy on the fly.
Of course pussy that I am I woke up instantly.
(I never face my fears in my dreams...I awake instantly)
Anyway, as I lie awake in bed waiting for it to be a more respectable time to actually get out of bed, I actually came up with a stand up rotine in my head.
Sure, it would kinda suck, but it would definitely fill the time on stage.

Why am I so fucking weird?